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Shit Happens when you're dreaming.

HAPPY 2011 folks! same rhythm have been going on my mind since forever. I guess Song of the Year 2010 award goes to P!NK; Rise Your Glass. Played it on loop a couple times when i was doing my work, cant remember any lyrics but the beat was deadly! i pondered and guess no one would be reading this and gave a sigh (of relief that is). it was not long ago that I realize that I really had no proper channel of venting. Things had happen and I'm getting over it now. Many times, i would just be ignorance and allow certain things to happen. Think a little too much at times and fell. Getting up is hard, getting up alone is harder. I; usually do it the second way. But no one asked for it right.

Many times people fall in love without knowing; fell out of love too soon. Me; idk. Imaginations had been running real wildly. I have like total no control over many things. Call me traditional; but to me, many things just seems to be a taboo. We all appear to be all so modern and new age. But behind walls who would ever know what we are thinking and talking about? Oh, this post seems so emo to start off the year with. But i was overwhelm by so many things in the shortest time ever.

SMU always seems like a dream for me. I guess the lazybones failed to give up and kicked in all the time and won. This dream seems further. Until hope was instilled in again recently. But face it, false hope that was. I was awaken. Its January now. It all seems like yesterday that I troubled what to wear when Poly life starts, vainpot starts cooking, attended orientation, met friends and of course foes, felt happy and accomplish, fell down and cried, thought that I was dying but we all survived through. Now reality is kicking in; throwing balls that i could never catch or hardly reach. I guess this is what people call life choices? Oh, who was the one talking about being emo. Alright; something more me.

Went to Guangzhou last month for the international business module ICA3. Wanting to go and actual going was two hell of a different thing. Initially it all seems so darn exciting and fun. Till i realize that jy was not selected to go. and i made sure carmen was confirm going then i decide. But before that it was real hectic. many things to complete. stress was kicking in. felt so unprepared really dread of even going to the airport. didnt sleep the night before i flew as i was still packing my luggage. It was not that i wanted to be so last minute; but many clothes and stuffs was with Erjie. She had Jaslyn's husband to pass the stuffs to be as he went to visit them. This is a real boring part, shall not elaborate further. Anw, till the last day of the trip, conscious me just simply dread for the trip to end. Dying over there, food sucks. I thought i could at least depend on the instant noodles there. But i guess i really didnt like the taste of it too alone with most local food. But i have to say, i did had really very nice food there too once in a while of probably part of certain meal tasted good. Tried some street food and i had finally tasted pig's blood or something. Been seeing it on TV but it's banned in Singapore. Dad was always talking about how it's made and it was damn common last time. Now I know! Met really nice schoolmates during the trip had had couple small talks with the locals there. My conclusion: They are just attracted to talking to us because we speak Good Mandarin and fluent English. There was the Lao Ban Niang (Lady Boss) of the famous Sze Chuan 'Chang Fen' (@beijing lu) which in our term is just simply 'Gua Tiao'. 2 Students who thought of marrying into Singapore we met when we had dinner and the above mentioned place and a second time along Bei Jing Lu shopping while we had a double scope of ice cream in that weather (: and also all the random stall vendors we shopped at. Their service attitude sucks but still there were many nice people along the way. Samantha shopped with us at Beijing lu. I was telling her how much i had wanted to have a friend call Samantha since young but had met none. If I was Sam, I would feel weird. LOL. But well, I was just being truthful! Fun things aside, the main objective of the trip was still to do our ICA. Teamed up with a couple nice people from other classes and Carmen. They made me feel guilty cause I felt that i didnt do much things to contribute! But i guess its alright. The project's still a long way to go.

Speaking of project, I aint suppose to be here right now, and is actually suppose to do my project! but i simply have no motivation now! Cant explain. But just.